1. You don't have to put cream in your coffee to make it taste good.

2. Coffee doesn't complain when you put whipped cream in it.

3. A cup of coffee looks good in the morning.

4. You won't fall asleep after a cup of coffee.

5. You can always warm coffee up.

6. Coffee comes with endless refills.

7. Coffee is cheaper.

8. You won't get arrested for ordering coffee at 3 AM.

9. Coffee never runs out.

10. Coffee is out of your system by tomorrow morning.

11. You can take black coffee home to meet your parents.

12. You can make coffee as sweet as you want.

13. You can smoke while drinking coffee.

14. You can grind out a cigarette in a cup of coffee.

15. Coffee smells and tastes good.

16. You don't have to put vinegar in your coffee.

17. If your coffee pot leaks, you can use a regular paper towel.

18. You can always get fresh coffee.

19. You can put coffee on, leave the room, and it'll be ready when you get back.

20. They sell coffee at police stations.

21. You can always ditch a bad cup of coffee.

22. Coffee goes down easier.

23. If you put chocolate in your coffee, it doesn't put on weight.

24. No matter how ugly you are, you can always get a cup of coffee.

25. A big cup or small cup? It doesn't matter.

26. Your coffee doesn't talk to you.

27. Coffee smells good in the morning.

28. Coffee is good when it's cold too.

29. Coffee stains are easier to remove.

30. Coffee doesn't care when you dunk things in it.

31. Coffee doesn't really care what kind of mood you're in.

32. Coffee doesn't shed.

33. Coffee is ready in 15 minutes or less.

34. You can't get a cup of coffee pregnant by putting cream in it.

35. Coffee doesn't mind being ground.

36. No matter how bad coffee is, you can always make it better.

37. Coffee doesn't have a time of the month...it's good all the time.

38. When coffee gets old, you can throw it away.

39. When you have a coffee, you don't end up with a pube in the back of your throat.

40. Coffee doesn't take up half your bed.

41. Coffee doesn't mind if you wake up at 3 AM and decide you want some.


43. You can have an intelligent conversation over coffee.

44. It can take up to 2 weeks for coffee to grow mold.

45. Coffee doesn't mind sleeping on its wet spot

46. You can pickup some coffee at a 7/11 any hour of the night

47. Having a cup of coffee wakes you up instead of putting you to sleep

48. You can put your lips to a cup of coffee without buying it dinner first

49. Coffee doesn't require hours of diddling foreplay. It's served hot.

50. A hot woman spilled on your lap isn't worth $4 Million.

51. You can get coffee out of a machine, and press a few buttons to get it just the way you like it.

52. Even prisoners are allowed to have coffee

53. You don't have to tell coffee you love it.

54. Coffee doesn't ride the brakes in your Porsche

55. You don't have to be beautiful or rich to get a fresh cup every morning56. A cup of coffee doesn't require a line to pick up

57. A friend will buy you a donut AND a coffee

58. There's always coffee to be had

59. Coffee doesn't expect you to maintain its vehicle

60. Great coffee only costs a buck more than the cheap stuff